Mindfulness and values-based behaviour
Mindfulness, as we discuss in the course, is a great tool for acting according to our highest desires and intentions. Remember the list in the first session, where we describe the characteristics of our ‘Self’? Our desires, quite separate from our actions, are almost always pure of heart and well-intentioned. Our morals and value-systems, when all is well and we are in situations outside of the pressure of normal life, are often well developed, thorough and considerate. So what is it that separates us from these good intentions?
Often, our behaviour does not reflect our moral reasoning. This has been the source of many studies in the social psychology field, as researchers have attempted to understand the foundations of moral reasoning, how we come to formulate our value-system and how we practice what we understand (for an interesting and comprehensive read on the formation of morality, see Eisenberg & Fabes, 1998). While it is still relatively unclear exactly why we stray so much in our moral behaviour, we have come to a fair understanding of the way in which we are built as moral agents:
FACTORS THAT CONTRIBUTE TO THE FORMATION OF MORAL REASONING
- Personality traits
- Socialization within and outside the home (family structures, schooling, peer groups, work environment etc)
- Cultural factors
- Educational & cognitive development
Each of these things, amongst others, affect the development of our moral identity to varying degrees (Hardy & Carlo, 2005). Moral identity is essentially how we see ourselves as moral agents, and a strong moral identity has been linked to greater prosocial (moral) behaviour (Aquino & Reed, 2002). Without delving too deeply, we ought to investigate the above factors to see how mindfulness could help us maintain a stronger moral line in our behaviour.
Below are brief descriptions about the abovementioned factors. Do not worry if you feel that you are thinking broadly, just sense what immediately comes to mind and jot down some key words or phrases. No-one has to see this work but you, so you can be honest and to the point! You are going to write down a few positive and negatives (relating to your moral behaviour) that you feel arise from your own personal situation with regards to the following:
Personality traits: Briefly judge your own temperament – how do you feel you tend to react to certain situations? What are your general feelings about yourself and your life? Are you naturally an introvert, or are you more outgoing – how does this affect your moral decision-making?
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Socialization: How is it that you have been affected by your parents, siblings and general home environment? How much have you adopted the values of your family – do you agree with them? How do your peers and friends affect your moral behaviour – do you feel morally encouraged by their presence and their beliefs?
_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Cultural Factors: What values do your culture and society promote? Are these in line with your own personal values? Are there any elements of the moral fabric of your culture that you disagree with?
_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Educational and cognitive development: How has your education (things you have read, learned or otherwise come across) affected the way you formulate your values? Do you think there is room to grow in this regard, and is that something you would like to do?
_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Now let’s revisit what we spoke about in the sessions – the goals of our Self and how Mindfulness can help us get closer to them. We talked about being able to better observe our own behaviour, notice the cracks in our calm and try revert back to our Self-traits. We are, for example, talking about maintaining a calm, balanced and kind mind while dealing with a difficult person. Or, recognizing the anger that we are building towards our loved one in a heated argument and instead allowing ourselves to remember not only the irritation of the moment but also the kindness and love that characterizes that relationship. There are a million examples, but often when we are talking about reverting to our Self-traits, we are in fact talking about behaving in a moral fashion! The link between Mindfulness and moral behaviour should soon become one that you fall in love with – being focused and present allows you to walk a better path, one that you alone have decided to walk and one that makes you happiest. Kindness? Love? Courage? Resilience? All a whole lot easier when you allow your mind to stay present and look at the situation from a more objective standpoint.
Revisit what you wrote down just now regarding what drives you towards and away from moral behaviour, and see if you can apply some of your knowledge of the principles of Mindfulness to each specific situation.
- What would you want to feel like?
- What tools might help you stay present?
- How will you put in place the measures needed to recognize where you go wrong?
Your moral reasoning will always be up to you, and in this we believe no-one should tell you what to think! What we can help you do, through Mindfulness, is to stick to whatever you decide. Through disciplined application of Mindfulness techniques and a developing state of presence, you can hold to what you think is right even under difficult circumstances. Your moral fibre is just like your muscle fibre – the harder you work it, the stronger it gets! The repeated application of your moral guidelines will forge them into your character, and we all know how great it feels to act in accordance with our values. With hard work, we can live lives of happiness and quiet pride, knowing that even when its difficult, we can drag our minds away from distraction and be strong in our actions.
Good luck!
Often, our behaviour does not reflect our moral reasoning. This has been the source of many studies in the social psychology field, as researchers have attempted to understand the foundations of moral reasoning, how we come to formulate our value-system and how we practice what we understand (for an interesting and comprehensive read on the formation of morality, see Eisenberg & Fabes, 1998). While it is still relatively unclear exactly why we stray so much in our moral behaviour, we have come to a fair understanding of the way in which we are built as moral agents:
FACTORS THAT CONTRIBUTE TO THE FORMATION OF MORAL REASONING
- Personality traits
- Socialization within and outside the home (family structures, schooling, peer groups, work environment etc)
- Cultural factors
- Educational & cognitive development
Each of these things, amongst others, affect the development of our moral identity to varying degrees (Hardy & Carlo, 2005). Moral identity is essentially how we see ourselves as moral agents, and a strong moral identity has been linked to greater prosocial (moral) behaviour (Aquino & Reed, 2002). Without delving too deeply, we ought to investigate the above factors to see how mindfulness could help us maintain a stronger moral line in our behaviour.
Below are brief descriptions about the abovementioned factors. Do not worry if you feel that you are thinking broadly, just sense what immediately comes to mind and jot down some key words or phrases. No-one has to see this work but you, so you can be honest and to the point! You are going to write down a few positive and negatives (relating to your moral behaviour) that you feel arise from your own personal situation with regards to the following:
Personality traits: Briefly judge your own temperament – how do you feel you tend to react to certain situations? What are your general feelings about yourself and your life? Are you naturally an introvert, or are you more outgoing – how does this affect your moral decision-making?
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Socialization: How is it that you have been affected by your parents, siblings and general home environment? How much have you adopted the values of your family – do you agree with them? How do your peers and friends affect your moral behaviour – do you feel morally encouraged by their presence and their beliefs?
_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Cultural Factors: What values do your culture and society promote? Are these in line with your own personal values? Are there any elements of the moral fabric of your culture that you disagree with?
_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Educational and cognitive development: How has your education (things you have read, learned or otherwise come across) affected the way you formulate your values? Do you think there is room to grow in this regard, and is that something you would like to do?
_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Now let’s revisit what we spoke about in the sessions – the goals of our Self and how Mindfulness can help us get closer to them. We talked about being able to better observe our own behaviour, notice the cracks in our calm and try revert back to our Self-traits. We are, for example, talking about maintaining a calm, balanced and kind mind while dealing with a difficult person. Or, recognizing the anger that we are building towards our loved one in a heated argument and instead allowing ourselves to remember not only the irritation of the moment but also the kindness and love that characterizes that relationship. There are a million examples, but often when we are talking about reverting to our Self-traits, we are in fact talking about behaving in a moral fashion! The link between Mindfulness and moral behaviour should soon become one that you fall in love with – being focused and present allows you to walk a better path, one that you alone have decided to walk and one that makes you happiest. Kindness? Love? Courage? Resilience? All a whole lot easier when you allow your mind to stay present and look at the situation from a more objective standpoint.
Revisit what you wrote down just now regarding what drives you towards and away from moral behaviour, and see if you can apply some of your knowledge of the principles of Mindfulness to each specific situation.
- What would you want to feel like?
- What tools might help you stay present?
- How will you put in place the measures needed to recognize where you go wrong?
Your moral reasoning will always be up to you, and in this we believe no-one should tell you what to think! What we can help you do, through Mindfulness, is to stick to whatever you decide. Through disciplined application of Mindfulness techniques and a developing state of presence, you can hold to what you think is right even under difficult circumstances. Your moral fibre is just like your muscle fibre – the harder you work it, the stronger it gets! The repeated application of your moral guidelines will forge them into your character, and we all know how great it feels to act in accordance with our values. With hard work, we can live lives of happiness and quiet pride, knowing that even when its difficult, we can drag our minds away from distraction and be strong in our actions.
Good luck!